Saturday 8 February 2014

8th February 2014 - Only thing worse than Broadband not Working - Is it failing to not work!!

It may seem a little strange title to a post, but the frustrations of Broadband in our household is the "intermittent" problem that does not see to have a real cause or solution. Don't get me wrong - the nice call center people at Sky have been very helpful, and indeed have halved the price of the boradband for a year due to the repeating "issues" upon the line that are apparently Not Sky, Not the Exchange, Not the line, Not the box, Not the filters, not Openreach, Not anyone (we haven't tried the "Act of God" yet to mollify those who do not necessarily believe in a higher deity of BB....

My first issue is of course the fact that the house is old and large! Too big for wifi throughout the house - despite what Mr Caine may be told in the advert - or at least I do not have a booster for my wifi - and do not think that my old steam driven desktop machines would fire up on anything except their trusty network cables. I am therefore aware that the B & Q wiring that I put in 12 years ago - or was it longer I forget - from the kitchen to the bedrooms and then around the house to the "Living Room/Office" may not have the highest quality to carry the signal..   I live with this. I am getting fast enough connections to run my three machines - there are only two of us after all - why would I need more than three machines ???

I am aware that my internal wiring may have a detrimental affect upon my connections. So when the winds and the storms start and the little orange light starts appearing on the hub box ( there should be three green lights - I am an expert on this - trust me!) I monitor the problem for a few hours. Normally into the early hours until frustration either causes me to watch SKY News or got to bed!

If, upon awaking the next morning, the problem is still occurring, ten minutes live and five minutes off line repeat until annoyed! then I go into "call Sky" mode. I have perfected this over the years, as it covers most of the questions.

First - down to the kitchen where the Openreach Main Box sits on the wall - about 7ft off the ground. Engineers tell me they have to be near the ground these days to allow the disabled or special needs the ability to reach them - but they had not heard this when the first wind up telephones were installed into my house. By going to the main box, and taking the front off and plugging into the "Test" socket - I stop any questions about my own wiring - I am connecting into the first point of contact in the house!.  Yes - it does involve taking the front off - but this happens so often the front stays off - I don't actually know where it may be - probably in a box somewhere!!

Second, I have a cheap and nasty handset. I paid £7.99 for it a while back. It was from Tesco. It has no fancy tricks - and is not wireless. It therefore cannot have any other interferences from the microwave or the planet mars - it is connected directly into the filter.

Third, I have a new filter available and check both.

Fourth, I bring the hub downstairs and plug into the filter. I have an extension lead in place behind the freezer so I just have to drag it out and plug in...  Pre-planning !

Fifth, bring the laptop downstairs. One because it does not need to be plugged in. Two, because it is Wi Fi - and I can sit at the breakfast table and check the connections...

Sixth, mobile phone at the ready - full charged - they have to disconnect the line to test it and need to call you back on a mobile phone.

And that is where I am now! In the kitchen watching some music channel on the TV because there is nothing else on except sport,with the wind howling up the back garden, blowing the chickens and thrusting through the dog flap robbing the house of heat.

And the three lights are just staring at me !!

Weather Girls are singing "Raining Men" on the TV - should be just Raining!!! But the lights will not stop.

What should happen now is the lights go off - I phone Sky - I nice call centre person calls me back on the mobile phone, a line test shows there is no problem - and we try a few other switch on and switch off and they decide to escalate to another department who will get back to me within a few days. this may not sound very helpful - but the line test invariably solves the problem and I get another few weeks of uninterrupted  service....

But I cannot go to the next stage until the line drops out...  and over the last hour I only lost it once for 5 seconds. I do not like to call until it has gone off twice....

Sadly, if it does not go off in the kitchen... it may actually be my problem in my own wiring!!!

And that is why the only thing worse than Broadband not Working, is it failing to not work...

Just give it a few more minutes !! Eh ???




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