Friday, 10 July 2015

10th July 2015 - On Learning Lines and Washing Lines

Thought for the day:"You can't make everyone happy - you are not pizza"

Mr Morgan - the Barber Surgeon

Isn’t it amazing what people notice? Take the other evening, I was chatting with a neighbour and she said “We’re all wondering how you manage to keep your washing on the line without using pegs even when there’s a stiff breeze”. 
Naturally, I graced this question with an answer reflecting the gravity and importance of the enquiry and I think she’s still trying to work out how I do it using ’The Power of Greyskull’ together with a dash of ‘The Force’. But three aspects of the conversation later re surfaced as I settled down to slumber in the master bedchamber of Morgan Mansions and I don’t mind telling you it cost me sleep.

1.‘We’re all…. ‘ exactly HOW many of these domestic amazons have been gazing at my unmentionables as they flap unfettered in the wind ?

2.WHO exactly has been looking in wonderment at the contents of my washing line ?

3.I can understand the technical interest but apart from that ……why ?

Gee whiz. Now I’m not going to argue with the ladies of the area that surrounds the old family seat, they’re a formidable lot. And if the Government ever forms this ‘Home Guard’ against terrorism that they've been whittering on about these girls should be in the front line. Crikey, if you’re caught wearing a backpack or looking ‘a bit shifty’ you’ll have had your lot. They’ll take you down with a well aimed fairy cake between the eyes and frogmarch you into the W.I. meeting for interrogation by the entertainments committee. 

Don’t know the words to ‘Jerusalem’ ? A revulsion to jammy dodgers? Never known the pleasure of a ham and pickle sarnie with the crusts cut off? Look out ! 

Now, I’ve had many wonderful conversations over the fence with Ernie next door. Whilst I’ve been knocking up a couple of HMS Victory salt boxes one side of the fence and Ern’s been watering his begonias on the other we’ve put the world to rights and I’ve benefited immeasurably from his 80 plus years experience of this strange old planet that we call home. But never once has Ern’ ever questioned why my nethergarments remain draped securely upon the line in the face of torrent and tempest. 

Perhaps it’s a bloke thing. Perhaps some things are just better not discussed.
Oh, in case anyone’s wondering it’s obvious, they stay on because I ....  
( At this point, ladies and gentlemen, my keyboard ran out of ink, sorry about that.)

Meanwhile - in other news, the VAT that holds the Chateau 41 while fermenting is empty. This is not bad news - it means that Susie has bottled the latest brew and there is an expectation of wine for the future days - though I may need to get some more Grape Juice to ensure that we are ahead of the game rather than behind...

And, following the penmanship of yesterday - the Klabautermann song is complete - posted upon some German Sites and seems to be getting an acceptable response...


And so - off to the South Coast tomorrow - so I lift my glass  - Cheers

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